Study in the need for chocolate....

I'm not sure how to title this post....I get newsletters pertaining to whatever stage of pregnancy I am in from a few different pregnancy websites. The latest one was from Baby.com. There was a blurb on there about this woman who keeps getting nasty remarks from people at work and just around about her size.....She's is 29 weeks which is right where I am.

I've had nasty comments thrown my way, mostly from strangers and one person at work who is a complete moron. The moron at work as since stopped making comments when we mentioned discrimination (moron is store manager).....Other comments have come from coworkers but they weren't meant in a malicious way.

One friend said to me the other day, she thought I looked bigger for my gestational age, she said I looked too big to only be 29 weeks. Well I think my due date is off just a bit but not that much...Still I'm apparently a little person as most folks like to tell me now a days....."That's why you look so big, it's because you are such a little person, You're TINY" I hear a lot.....

Then there are the guys from Pakistan who work at one of the Jewelry kiosks in the mall who say " You are getting fat!!! When you babies coming?" to which I always reply "there's only the one, and in June" and they inevitably say "Just one? Are you sure you are fat!!!"
But I don't' mind, they are just men and don't know what they are talking about....They have stopped calling me baby when they come in to get their coffee though, guess I'm not a baby anymore....I'm a big girl :)

ANYWAY, I understand the frustration these women are going thru. Complete strangers ask me how far along am I and what I'm having...I had one lady yell across the Mall hallway "I do hope you are planning on breastfeeding!!!!" and when I didn't yell back "Of course I am" because I was to embarrassed/amused by the looks she and I were getting from others walking through the mall, she glared at me like I was some kind of horrible child neglecter.

I saw her later, she came in for coffee and asked me again giving me that same stern look. I told her I would have answered her before but that her yelled comment had seemed to draw to many other people to think about what I may or may not do with my breasts after MY child is born, and yes I do plan on breastfeeding. She said "oh well I guess I shouldn't have yelled it, it's just very important, you know one of the best things you can do for your child" I said to her "Yes Ma'am it sure is, but it is also a personal choice and some women for one reason or another may not be able to, doesn't mean they don't' want what's best for their baby." She blushed and grabbed her drink and left.

I don't think I let peoples comments get to me too much, there have been times but not so much anymore. I have only gained (at this point anyway) 14 pounds so far according to last weigh in, which I think is pretty good, I'll be closer to the minimum 25 pounds by the time Jack is born I'm sure.

The thing that worries me now, is how much my body will change after Jack is born. Don't know why I keep thinking about it, I'll blame the hormones for it, but still I keep worrying. Annoying.
I feel weird now about myself, part of me feels absolutely beautiful, I mean I'm pregnant glowing with future possibilities and what not, then I look at the veins branching across my belly and boobs and wonder how attractive am I really? Again it's the hormones.....Right?

I don't need that answered, I'm just silly is all.

Oh yea and I'm starting to get sad about missing feeling Jack move around in my belly. But I guess I'll have him to squirm around outside for the rest of my life so that'll make up for most of it.


I need chocolate